Saturday, October 25, 2014

October Scribblings

Deepavali Enam
Deepavali is all about crackers and sweets, for me joy starts with enam. It is customary in India that young people get blessed with wishes and money on auspicious days, this gift money is enam. With this money I buy second packet of bijili or pundu vedi, and will use them as weapons for war between Chellam illam and Kamalam illam. Cracking a pundu vedi is tough but rewarding, it requires bullet arm to make a horizontal throw with enough power to cross the vacant land and smash burst on the parapet wall, here it will leave a black mark which is not possible with bijili. Now I earn, I can buy what I want, still the joy that enam brings in me is fresh and silly!
For those who are interested Chellam is my grandma, Kamala is our neighbor and I’m not doing this anymore; I don’t know pundu vedi is still available in market, it looks like a onion or unbroken garlic which will burst on forceful impact. Bullet arm is a cricketing term, where a fielder makes a flat throw from outside 30 yard circle which reaches keepers hand without a bounce.

Bruce, He is batman.
Bruce, black in color, very playful, has a tendency to bite first and bark next. He is 10 month old now; he is the 7th prime pet after Sivaji, MGR, Kutti, Kutti Jr., Tiger, Caesar. As friends of primes’ many other dogs have found shelter in our home, not once I have noticed such biting behavior with any dog. And so giving Bruce a rabbis shot became more then necessary, in hospital, doctor suggested that we must first give him the vaccine shots. I agreed and asked for medicine, she gave me a prescription and I found that it’ll cost Rs.500! and so I asked if I could skip it and at last gave him a Rs.100 only rabbis shot. Its not that I can’t afford it, and I’m not stingy though I tend to take a crocin when I feel feverish rather visiting Doctor and pay 200 for same prescription. Actually I thought “He is Bruce, what he does defines him, he is BATMAN, he does not need vaccine even if he needs, only Fox can prepare it.”

My Broadband
Android and app developers believe that when I’m connected to Wifi I’m accepting all the terms and condition to update any random app as they wish! No, it is not that, I have picked limited usage tariff; want to know why. Because I pay my bill, I’m not my friend as his bill is paid by his company. For the heave sake stop sending me the irritating Deepavali crackers bursting video, almost every person I chat with, and every group I’m a member of has this video, the same video; and the goddamn Whatsapp is not detecting the content and repeatedly downloads the same 10MB video! I’m telling this to you for the last time, you can’t download cause I’m connected to Wifi!!! Finally I change the setting to no media; yes I work in IME and still prefer text over Media. My BROADBAND is not that broad!!!

Friday, October 17, 2014

Short story: Forbidden love

Setting: Senthil works in a IT service provider, his lead is Yamini, his good friend Surender takes care of seasonal decorations. A new member is going to join their team.

The office was decorated with stars and bells, I could see small plastic tree peeping from every cubicle, Ribbons, hanging angles and ties made of shiny cloth were making the whole ODC glow. I looked at the far end of the cubicle where my seat is located, outright dull, Surender has done this in purpose; he knows am skeptic about birthday of Christ and I refer the day as X’mas and not the usual way. He came in front of me from nowhere “I respect your belief machi, I made sure your cubicle is not decorated!”, I had enough time to deliver the friendly punch he was expecting.

Yamini called me to inform me that I’m late and formal introductions has already happened, and instructed me to come to pantry right away. Being in her team is hell and heaven, while you can enjoy the company of good-looking ;) team mates you might want to wear pink to merge into the team :P A strong handshake followed by a smile that involves least muscle movement, absolutely formal! Hardly 10 minutes in the office Prasanna has already made the rest of pinkies run to restroom for second touch up.

I was not sure if Yamini is helping me reduced load or wants to get rid of last XY in the team, the new girl will share my work, cubicle and vnet. “Targets are high here, and I don’t spare anytime for gossips” I was making it clear to Prasanna and she said ‘ok… cricket then’ and winked. This woman just winked at me! and she is ok with talking cricket :D I don’t want to scare her with all the docs and codes the every first day so gave her application walkthrough and started for lunch. Boom! my cubicle is glowing, its brightest now! Walking ahead I searched for Surender and spotted him sitting in my chair and carefully knitting with Prasanna.
“So you decorated my cubicle to fullest in 30 mins?”
“Machi, this is for Prasanna”
“Her presence lights my cubicle, you get out” I winked at her.
She turned her chair towards dumb machine and knocked us out. Sitting in my chair extended my hand and tapped in phone, she turned around and I gave blank stare for 5 mins before she tapped on the phone again. God! She was so pink, she is blushing! at my wink? :eek: I met her eye they were kind, and looked at her funny nose it was cute by the way, I really wanted to know if her lip-gloss taste strawberry as I’d prefer it, maybe I can buy one for her on first date. The black marker hit my face and fell on my lap bringing me back, “you can give me KT or I can speak to Yamini if you feel different to have me as team mate”. I didn’t not respond, after a detailed pause I said “Will I look better if I shave?” she started laughing.

Five months have gone by, Prasanna works well and we have brought the back log to 0 long time back and I’m expecting my release mail anytime. I am asking Prasanna out almost every other day for a date, she never declines them but proposes different places so we won’t date but will worship or do some CSR. Last week we went to Sholinganallur Pratyangara temple, a week before that we went for Outreach – JA session, sometime back we went to beach to clean up the empty sundal packets but not to eat sundal. Sometimes I feel I’m being used, you know the friend-zoned guy? Not once but thrice her senses persuaded me into fighting with some random guy in bus trying to hit on her, every time she steps outta bus catches auto and leave to her apartment.

I bought this Apache bike only after seeing her, I love the pillion seats placed that way; how much ever the pillion rider tries they’ll end up grabbing driver :mrgreen: so needed by every guy. Of course she insist on scooty or bus, very rugged girl if I deny she gets a bus or auto. It feels awkward to follow auto to her home but what if she gets abducted! And I love when she shouts at me “get a job, stop following me, no one is going to rape me!” from auto; it is but a divine sight to see her hair flow in air. I tapped the phone she turned back, “care to date?”,
“won’t you stop?”,
“ok then cricket match, I have two tickets for this Friday evening IPL match!”,
“match ok, date not ok”.

I logged off by 4pm, so did she, the vnet rang “Yamini, whats the matter? I was just leaving”, “Your application has no back log for last 5 weeks, I let you choose the application I’m going to release you”. Prasanna was silent, then “choose GCB you can sit here”, “so you know this?”, she nodded and picked her hand bag to leave. Match starts by 6pm getting a bus is risky so I ring for a call taxi. She snatched my phone and said “why taxi why not your bike?”, “It’s bike ok, not scooty, I am not letting you go in auto, lets go in taxi”, “Yes idiot I said bike, bike is ok with me”.

Thanks to the seat designer she is leaning on me now! Oooo ho! “you will keep in touch na, even after changing team?”, “why would you even ask such question, I’m going to marry you”. “No you can’t”. The roughest road with better bumps was 200m ahead and rain started to pour down like hell. “Just take left and go, match will not happen anyway at least we can watch some movie in my home”. I parked at her space, D2, first time I’m visiting her home, I can’t believe she choose to stay alone than having a roommate and sharing rent. “I get to pick the movie”, “whatever”, she told from kitchen, there was no sofa or chair just one bean bag and a table on top of which laptop is sitting now.

I used her wifi to check my whatsapp messages, ‘Yamini: what’s with you guys, why she cried when I said you’ll be released’. She made soup gave it to me in bowl and she had in directly from boiler, I made a sheepish smile “Mr. Perfect you are unexpected guest, you can choose to leave”. I played ‘The Notebook’, “I know you won’t leave till rain stops, Google just told me the weather is expected to continue. I am going to make popcorn”. She came back with oily paper bag full of popcorn, “I can’t believe you have this much of popcorn for you, how to you maintain this figure”, “excuse me”, “mm… I like this flavor”. Being a polite guest I offered to share the bean bag with her, when popcorn was done I popped the question ‘why should you cry?’ and showed Yamini’s msg.

She broke down and sobbed on my chest, kept saying “you are so nice, but I’m, I can’t bare this”. I held her close, told not to cry and if she is married already that’s fine, and if she is having a bad marriage we can get married after she can get divorced. She laughed, but still cried; I kissed her cheek and hugged her tight. She didn’t resist, I sensed the opportunity, wow her lip-gloss is strawberry and they are soft. Stretching arms I said “I feel it’s going to rain harder and I can stay here tonight”, she got up and ran to bedroom “get out, get out now, never come back”. I felt bad, said that I’m sorry and left.

I don’t know if I should mail GCB lead, I wanted to talk to her make things right then decide on anything. Got the official mail from Yamini, Sizing down BGS team, but the content was different; Prasanna is getting release as she is moving to Delhi. I called Prasanna she didn’t pick up; I got off my desk and went to her apartment. The apartment was locked, I stormed down to get bike, security was standing there holding envelope and key for me “Madam told to give this to Man parking bike in this slot, are you the one sir”. I nodded and opened it; Dear Senthil, go back to flat and open it get the box from bean bag, read them and courier it to new office address given. The box had memoirs and medical reports on silicon implant and few surgeries; I continued reading letter “didn’t it occur to you, I have a gender neutral name. You showered unadulterated love, which even my parents could not, I love you for that but never try to reach me, I don’t deserve you. I wish you a great life”.

Key-Prasanna's dialog in red, Senthil's in blue, Yamini's in orange, Surender's in green
This is the short story I came up with for an office blog challenge, it was to write a romantic story, where girl declines the proposal and the reason must be acceptable and shocking. So how to you rate this gay story? :P